The weekend went by way too quick. It was a busy couple of days filled with 2 birthday parties, shopping, visiting Ryan's gram, and of course my Dr apt. We had a lot of fun, but I really wish that I had tomorrow off to get some stuff done around my house. I seriously must have 5 loads of laundry left to do. Well, either a day off, or maybe a maid.

Ok, so the Dr appointment- I had an ultrasound and some blood work. Wouldn't you know that I was at a birthday party when they called me with the results! I guess I'm not ready for my trigger shot yet. I have to go back tomorrow for another US and blood work. The way that the message sounded though, I am close. So maybe tomorrow night?

I think that I may have made progress on the chicken front. I think Ryan is accepting that if I really want to do this, then it's going to happen. We actually talked about him building me a coop instead of buying one. Who knew that coops would be so ridiculously expensive? He even took a ride with me this afternoon to Kellys house to pick up the book she ordered us about raising chickens.

Guess what I'll be reading about this week??

I can't believe it's getting close to that time again. On Sunday, I go for an ultrasound to see if I'm ready to trigger. If I am, it should only be 7-11 days (can't remember exactly) until my FET. I'm starting to feel excited and hopeful again.

The whole chicken debate is still going on. I have yet to make progress at convincing Ryan that it would be neat. It's not going to stop me though. I have spent countless hours on the internet looking up chickens, and chicken care, and coops, etc. My friends all think I'm crazy...except for Kelly. I called her last night to ask her about her neighbors chickens (who by the way did not stink!) and found out that she has been seriously considering raising chickens as well!! I am so excited by this.

She ordered us a book about raising chickens, and I shared some websites for her to check out. Today, I went online and compared breeds, and I am deciding which ones would be right for me. I really like the Easter Eggers- they are hardy enough for the cold weather here, and they lay blue and green eggs. C'mon, that is so cool.

On a way more serious note. I talked to my mother in law last night, and Ryans gram isn't doing so well. She has been fighting cancer, and it appears that the cancer is winning. At her last apt, they found that the tumors are growing and that the chemo is not working. She was given the option of continuing the chemo or not. I think she is taking a couple days to think about it.

Speaking of grandparents, I called my grandpa the other day. He sounded so much better than the last couple of times that we've spoken. He said that he is still having some difficulties, but overall he's better. This makes me so happy.

Here's a couple of pictures from the other day. You can see some of the scrapes on his face. And yes those are nails sticking out of the wall. Hopefully we get that porch done soon! He's very careful around them though, like he says "BIG BOO-BOOS"

Yup, he's that cool...........

Enjoying a yogurt smoothie.

Guess who got really lucky, and didn't have to make desserts this morning! The place that I ordered my pies from ended up being open today. Oh, they were sooooo worth it to. I thought that I got a key lime pie, but it was actually a key lime cheesecake. Then Ryan saw a pear, ginger cheesecake and got that to. YUM!! Overall, it was a really nice Easter. I kept all the food really simple so that I wouldn't have to slave away in the kitchen all day. The weather was gorgeous and I actually got to enjoy it a little.

Ok, so this is going to sound like it's coming from left field somewhere, but I want some pet chickens. Yes, chickens! It's something that I've considered, but never really thought that I could do it. Well, I watched an episode of Martha the other day, and it was about raising chickens. So, I started looking it up, and I think it's totally doable.

Ryan is NOT on board with the pet chicken thing. So it may be a while before I can do it, and it may involve a lot of begging. I'm not talking about a lot of them. I'm thinking just a handful of chickens will do, and no roosters. From what I've read so far about it, chickens are social and friendly, and can be a lot of fun. Of course, the fresh eggs would be a nice bonus.

This website has a lot of good info, and they even sell all the supplies. www.mypetchicken.com

I'll keep everyone updated on how the Karcher chicken debate unfolds..................

Yet again, I have been down and out with a migraine for the past 2 days. I'm so glad that I only have to take this new medication for 2 days more. Who knows, maybe it's not even from that, but I'm still glad. The weather here has been incredible, and I've been either in bed or on the couch for most of the time. It made me feel like crap when Griffin was begging me to take him outside to play. Ryan did take him out, but still, how do you explain to a 2 yr old that Mommy doesn't feel well when he says "Mommy play?" and tries dragging me to the door.

At one point this afternoon, I did go out and sit on the porch. It felt nice to get some fresh air. Ryan was trying to fix the screen door (the porch is a work in progress), so Griffin and I went out. I took a couple of cute pictures of Griff playing with his cars. I'll have to post them when I get a chance. He took a good fall off his wagon while he was out playing with Ryan, and he has scrapes all over his face and head. In the pictures you can actually see the road rash. My poor little guy.

Tomorrow, I have family coming over in the afternoon for Easter. Like, I said, I've done nothing for the past couple of days. Hopefully, I'll get everything done in the morning. Ryan actually vacuumed today, and did some picking up. So I have a little bit of a start. However, in my haze, I forgot that I ordered a fruit pie and a key lime pie, and I never picked them up. So I guess I will now have to make dessert.

Why? There are just so many whys when it comes to infertility. I don't even know where I want to start. On one of the Babycenter boards, a couple of women were taking their pregnancy tests today- both got negatives. It breaks my heart. Not only for them, but for everyone struggling with it.
I guess today, reading that thread, it brought me back to the time before getting pregnant with Griffin. I was so fearful that I would never have a baby. I questioned everything I had ever done in my life- have I done something to deserve this? why me? I worked so hard and struggled so much to stay positve. I believed that the things in your life are put there for a reason, and an opportunity to learn something- I still believe that.
But why do some things have to be soooo hard? Especially something like getting pregnant. Isn't it a completely natural, biological function of a womans body? Shouldn't all women who want to have a baby be given that opportunity? Why don't more insurance companies offer infertility coverage? If a man can't get an erection, I'm sure that they have no difficulty in their insurance providing the coverage. So why not infertility? It baffles me.
I am extremely fortunate in that my insurance does cover IVF, and it covers all of it. I just wish that all women who need this, had access to it. It seems so unfair to me. Of course, I count my lucky stars everyday when I look at Griffin. I am so blessed to have had the opportunity to have just one child. It's just days like this that I feel greedy, or like I'm pushing my luck trying for a second. I shouldn't feel guilty, I know. I need to do what feels right, and I feel that longing to have another baby.